miss independent

i recently discovered that a sorority sister of mine reads my blog.

hi, kim! :) this one is for you, my fellow miss independent.

***

".......she's got her own thing.... miss independent..... that's why i love her......"

i like to sometimes think that ne-yo was inspired to sing his song Miss Independent about me, and my fabulous lady friends.

yup. i'm independent. i'm a tough cookie. i was raised this way. my mom taught me never to rely on a man. make sure that i can stand on my own two feet and take care of myself, the rest that a man could bring is happy details. i'm so thankful for her advice. i have grown to be very independent, and i like it.

along with the independence my mom harped on, my dad also instilled in me "character." whenever i didn't want to do a particular task, or wanted to quit - he always said that those not-so-fun times would build in me great character. for example, i somehow always ended up on the crappy softball team. like - all of the rejects and me. not that i was some super star, but i did always make all-stars. i'm just sayin'.... there were many, many times that i just wanted to throw my hands up and quit. my dad would say - no, you can't quit. this is building character. and, whenever it was 1000 degrees outside in southeast arkansas and my dad insisted that i mow our yard - he said it was building character. he not-so-secretly wanted boys so he made meg and me do laborious activities that he would have boys do. mowing the yard was one of those tasks that he said would build character and was a good thing for a woman to know how to do.

by now, my cup should runneth over in the character department.

having said all of this, since being married - i have had to learn to share my independence with J. he's a tough cookie too. have you met him? he pretty much can do anything. he's handy like that. he enjoys being able to do things for me. for a while, i had a hard time letting go of my self-righteous i-can-do-it-all-myself attitude. his favorite thing to say after he's opened a jar, or reached the cup on the top shelf, or broken apart the dang chopper that i cannot ever seem to get apart to wash, or carried something heavy {that i totally could have carried for myself} is, "see, that's why you need me." i love it. i'm slowly getting used needing him. ahem.

but, my reliance on him came back to bite me in the rear on thursday night. j was with his summertime mistress wrapping up and tell her that he was done with her.... for a few weeks, while i was diligently working in preparing the wood hood for our little shindig on friday evening. i cleaned the house, bought the groceries for the grilling activities that will soon commence, and even got him his favorite - key lime pie. afterall, he is done with that mistress!

one of the chores around our home that j does handle is the yard. i mean - i know how to mow. i did my "boy" chore that women should learn at my house growing up [which i shared with my sister on occasion :) ]. i'm tough. i could do it, but he does it. and, i'm just fine with that. until thursday....

like i said - he was breaking his summer fling off with miss calculus and i wanted to surprise him with having the yard mowed when he got home. mind you, i've never even started our mower because that's his job. but, i felt this was a nice thought and gesture since he's been working so hard.

i maneuvered our little {big} mower out of the tiny space that j had somehow gotten it wedged into. i - remembering from back in the day - checked to make sure it had gas. this takes brains, people. took a good, long look at the mower to see if it came with any fancy instructions on how to get the blasted thing started. i must say - mowers have come a long way in the past 10 years. or 20 - my dad was cheap and our mower was old as dirt 10 years ago.

moving on -

seeing no fancy keys, or instructions, or buttons, or anything that looked out of the ordinary - i gave the pull start string a strong yank{because i've been working out} and she started right up! yes! success!!! i was going to mow this yard and j was going to be super proud of me and excited that he didn't have to do it. i was doing the boy chore. yes. i AM still tough. i AM still miss independent. i'm mowing my own yard. ha!!!

i made one nice pass across the yard. that is so nice to be able to instantly see the results of your work. jungle to the right, nice, short, cut grass to your left. sweet, sweet satisfaction.

as i was relishing in my accomplishment - a mere 3 minutes, one pass through the yard - the blasted mower let out this wretched screeching noise, and was difficult to maneuver. i instantly released the little safety bar and she stops. i check underneath the mower to make sure i hadn't mistakenly hit a cat, or a pipe, or a telephone poll that somehow got wrapped around the blade. thankfully - there was nothing but grass.

i pushed the mower back to the sidewalk and attempted to get it started again - nothing. the pull start was like pulling an ox. it didn't budge. {explicative.} i gave it a good try several times to no avail.

i just stood there. looking at the mower. bain of my existence. this is not building character, dad.

WHAT? i was ticked. my plan had failed. i was not going to be able to puff my chest out and boast about my mowing skills. my independent little heart crushed because i had to give into failure on my "boy" job. now, from the mess i have created - j will probably have to fix the mower before he actually can mow. neat.

so, j - you win. i do need you, afterall, to mow the yard. [i will pay close attention this time to make sure i know how to do it. you know..... just in case.]


thank goodness ne-yo didn't mention "mowing her own lawn..." as one of the things he found sexy about miss independent.


xoxo -

miss semi-independent.